Heads I'd Like to Get In To: 50Cent

A few years ago a new show came out on Oprah's channel in which a "celebrity life coach" was there to "fix" the lives of famous people dealing with setbacks.  I never watched it but it made me think about famous heads I'd like to get in to and the one that comes to mind most often is Mr. Curtis Jackson, aka 50Cent.

As Social Workers, we are fully aware of the benefits of therapy.  We understand how freeing it can be to talk about the hard parts of our lives and how therapy helps people move on from traumatic experiences. Therapy sessions provide a safe, caring environment where people can process their thoughts and experiences in a positive way.  I might be biased but I love therapy!  I really do.  In my opinion, the benefits of a therapeutic relationship with a qualified professional cannot be overstated.  

So, I realized a while ago that I have a soft spot for 50Cent.  Before you crucify me, hear me out.  If you can get past his disrespectful, misogynistic attitude and behavior; his quick, aggressive temper; his seeming lack of concern for the feelings of others and his blatant narcissistic tendencies you'd see what I see: a man deeply affected by unresolved childhood trauma.  Its like I can see his pain and how he masks it.

One of the things about being a social worker is our ability to see past outward behaviors down to the underlying issues.  We don't see "bad" kids, we see kids dealing with dysfunctional homes and families acting out in the only way they can.  We don't see "junkies" and "addicts", we see people struggling to cope with life problems and falling into traps they can't get out of.  Social workers are able to see past the exterior.  

I think part of the reason why his story resonates with me so much is my feelings for young boys growing up in the inner city.  I feel so strongly for them.  When I think about the problems young boys are facing, its hard to see a way out.  Neighborhoods like the one 50Cent grew up in are merciless in their ability to suck young boys in and spit them out right into jail or the grave.  Boys are losing their lives younger and younger and our communities are paralyzed by violence, fear and addiction.  It's no wonder why so many young boys turn to crime and violence, their neighborhood is truly a trap.

Knowing his story and reading about some of the things he does and says now, I'd be willing to bet there were some conduct issues in childhood along with some sort of learning difficulties as well.  Because of his childhood and his mother's murder when he was eight, I'm also thinking about symptoms of PTSD and maybe a mood disorder like depression.  He also seems to have issues relating to others which could be the result of broken attachments in childhood that affect his relationships to this day.  And there's probably much more.  Being exposed to drugs and violence in the home and community has profound impacts that can last forever.   Of course, I don't know him personally and I could be totally wrong, but I'd love to get in that head and really go deep to help him process his life experiences.    

Are there any famous people, living or dead, that you would love to get on the couch?  Why?

Case in Point: Meet Alexis

Alexis is a 14 year old girl from New York.  She was referred to you by her pediatrician after a positive Chlamydia test and concerns about cutting school and problems in the home.  The doctor also mentions an issue with sexual abuse previously reported to the authorities.  

Two months ago, Alexis left New York to live with her father, after revealing that she had been raped by the mother's boyfriend when she was 12.  Alexis's mother chose not to believe her, leading Alexis to move to Philadelphia with her father and step-mother, who previously lived alone.  During the interview, Alexis tells you she is not sexually active and has no boyfriend.  She explains that when she was absent from class 50 times she was in the counselor's office working on anger management.  She mentions tension between herself and the step-mother, saying that the step-mother doesn't respect her and she feels that it may come to blows between the two of them.

When describing the situation, Alexis is sweet and engaging, she laughs when appropriate and listens intently as questions are asked.  She cries when the subject of her abuse arises and becomes very angry when her mother's reaction is mentioned.  In the end, she says that she thinks counseling would be helpful for her to move forward and that she is willing to work with her new family.
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"I can't believe she chose him over me.  She's supposed to be my mother."

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Alexis was brought to the office by her step-mother, who describes a completely different scenario.  From what she says, Alexis has been sending and receiving sexually explicit text messages, sneaking out of the house at night and bringing boys home during the day when she cuts class.  They took her cell phone as punishment only to find another one that her boyfriend gave her; and when they confronted her, the argument almost turned into a fight. Alexis' father desperately wants to get his daughter some help, but her behavior has turned the house into a "war zone."

Where do we start with this family?  What should we do FIRST with Alexis?